If “I” Were God…….


!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!000000000000000000me4

 

 

 

 

 

 

sky-background-sun-and-clouds-background

 

If “I” Were God…….

Every parent, family friend, babysitter or caregiver that leaves a child, toddler, baby, kid, infant, pet of any type….in a hot car in summer, unattended, for more than 30 seconds….would experience their genitals seize up and become set afire to reproduce the exact temperature of that vehicle that the moron in question, left the child, toddler, baby, kid, infant, pet of any type…..IN. In other words your crotch, penis, balls, vagina, would reach the temperature of 170° in seconds.

 

 

If “I” Were God…….

Any human responsible for lying 935 times to the American people, and in particular the stupid mindless drones who inhabit CongrASS, about the original wars in Iraq and Afghanistan, if these lying dumbasses were to ever open their mouths to offer “opinions and advice” to the current POTUSA….I’d immediately fill those mouths with camel feces. On camera. After which they would instantaneously be transported to Iraq to be face to face with a group of ISIS idiots.

 

sistinechap460

 

If “I” Were God…….

John Boehner would have a 4 inch penis growing from the middle of his forehead so he could jerk himself off instead of the American citizens whom he is supposed to work FOR, as his oath of office states, and not the Koch Brothers, special interest groups such as A.L.E.C., the NRAssholes or alcohol distributors.

 

BrP7ImVCYAImjTN

 

 

If “I” Were God…….

Harry Reid would have a pair of nuts growing from his chin, big, hairy, full balls, He would then possess what he lacks, so he could stand up on the Senate floor and fight for what THIS Black President needs from his number one Congressional point man. Instead of acting like a frightened 4 year old confronted with the monster under the bed.

 

if-I-were-God-6

 

 

If “I” Were God…….

Michele Bachmann, Sarah Palin, Ann Coulter, Pat Boone, Donald Trump, Joe Arpaio, Ted Nugent, Rush Limbaugh and a few others, they know who they are, would come see Me. Soon. They would not stay up here but for a few seconds as I read from the book of major fuck ups…..but I’d have them all visit Me before their final destination.

 

 

If “I” Were God…….

Elizabeth Warren would have a moment of complete clarity and realize the reason I put her down there, among the lost souls in the Senate, was so she could gain the necessary tools to become the first Female President Of The United States. Much why I inserted Barack into the Senate back in 2004. Get in the game Elizabeth….you know why I choose you. I got this, you have bigger loaves to share and fish to fry.

 

1024px-20040814_Bud_Billiken_Obama_float

 

 

If “I” Were God…….

Hillary Clinton and William Jefferson Clinton would vanish. On that same disappearing bus would be Tricky Tiny Dick Cheney, Lyin Still Unfitt Mitt Romney, Chuck Todd, Jake Tapper, Don Lemon, The Entire Fox News Staff, Wolf Blitzer, The Morning Joe folks, The Entire Fox News Staff, (did I say that already) The Koch Brothers, Millionaire mooks who believe money buys elections, and the following dumbasses: John McCain, Lindsey Graham, Louie Gohmert, Mitch McConnell, Mark Rubio, Ted Cruz….I already took care of that Cantor moron. I keep Chris Christie around cause ya’ll still need some comedic relief.

 

If “I” Were God…….

The 300 plus young Nigerian girls would be united with their families and the Boko Haram cowards who abducted them, would all be captured and sold into slavery, forced kicking & screaming into made marriages to men who care not what orifice they violate and used as indentured servants on a Clive Bundy spread.

 

 

 

black-jesus

 

If “I” Were God…….

ANYone who utters the word “Impeachment” would immediately have his/her colon stuffed with fire ants and bed bugs….because dumbfuckery must be met with extreme pain and suffering when spread against MY chosen one, the anointed Barack Hussein Obama, and his immediate White House staff. Oh yeah, the word suit against Barack, will bring down upon it’s instigators a complete darkening of the skin to the tone of Black Strap Molasses.  You sue My Anointed One, yo do so as a Negro.

 

 

If “I” Were God…….

The very next human whom violates all My rules of creation and goes on a shooting rampage, will be guided, by Me, to the nearest rally and campaign event held by the NRAssholes, he will then proceed to shoot and kill all NRAsshole hierarchy and leadership executives. Or, if I’m that kinder, gentler God you speak of, I’ll just resurrect the original members of the Black Panther Party and send them into local Target stores armed with semi automatic rifles and THEN you will see some gun reform laws take effect on the chickenshit Senate/House floor.

 

Cause nobody wants to see Negro’s armed with the exact same weapons you now see caucasian dumbasses carrying in public places where there are children……do you.  If “I” Were God.

 

 

Evolve — Playthings

Published on Jun 25, 2014

Play things: kids find everything. Their play things….and yours. Have a gun? Lock it up.

 

 

 

Enjoy the Slid Show.

 

This slideshow requires JavaScript.

20 Responses

  1. Reblogged this on It Is What It Is and commented:
    I have to share ….. Love this thought process! Read on ….

    Like

  2. OMG!! Bursting at the seams!! Agree w Barbara on the grab star pic! Looking good!

    Like

  3. Are you looking for date? Quite the avatar photo.LOl. Just teasing. HUGS

    Like

    • Thats my God look with no shirt because God is naked. ;-)

      Like

      • LOL. God doesn’t have form. I called you. Just got your voice mail. I figured you were sleeping. I am so sorry about you being in hospital. Are you in pain? Don’t try to be macho…take it when you need it. I have missed you too. I go into hospital Monday for another back treatment. Hugs and healingoooxx

        Like

      • I am in no pain because I have no feeling in those toes so I am good.

        Like

  4. Oh my goodness! This was so funny it must break some kind of law or something… :D Good ’nuff!

    Like

  5. Oh My, this was spectacular! I loved this, it had me laughing all the way through.

    Like

Reply At Your Own Risk. Leave The Dumbfuckery At The Door.

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

Follow

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.

Join 453,266 other followers

%d bloggers like this: